The Middle East problem for people in a hurry...

Phedrus has attempted to formulate a concise, unbiased and balanced history of the Middle East problem in plain language for people in a hurry who want to learn what the deal is in less than 10 minutes. It is hoped this potted history achieves that objective...

The Middle East problem basically stems from the unwarranted imposition of an artificial Jewish homeland commonly referred to as 'Israel' on Arab land in Palestine.

Historical background:

Throughout history, the Jews have never had their own country as such, though it is clear they originated from the region they now occupy, it was never a properly constituted Jewish state. The Jews have a long and troublesome history. They have proved impossible to live in peace with and have been kicked out of over 100 places around the world in the last 1,750 years alone. In simple terms, they are a deeply unpopular bunch of assholes who invariably cause nothing but trouble wherever they settle. Moreover they seem to actively ENJOY being a pain in the ass to good folks everywhere.

One of the worst purges they ever suffered as a consequence of their refusal to conform to decent values was at the hands of the Nazis in the 1930s. Hitler became sick of the way they had taken over his country and resolved to rid europe of them entirely. However, before the plan could be fully implemented, Hitler was defeated in the Second World War and a large number of surviving Jews remained in the continent. A post-war conference was held to decide how the Jews could best be protected from future pogroms and it was decided that the obvious thing to do was to grant them their own homeland where they might seek refuge when things got tough again. A group of malcontents called Zionists (a modern movement founded in the 1800s) wanted this homeland located in the Biblical land of Israel, since it was something of a Bible prophesy. The trouble was, for thousands of years, this land had been owned by Arabs. And Arabs don't get on with Jews any better than the rest of us.

The creation of Israel in Palestine was originally outlined in the Old Testament and is claimed by the Jews to be God's will. God promised Abraham that if every one of his male descendants were circumcised on the eighth day after birth, then the land of Israel – the 'Promised Land' – would belong to the Jews for ever. This bizarre arrangement, which the Jews grandly refer to as 'The Covenant' is, incredibly, the sole basis for establishment of modern Israel in Arab Palestine in1948 following the so-called Balfour Declaration. Predictably, perhaps, the consequences have been disastrous.

An analogy might be helpful at this point. Consider you own your home and it has a good-sized garden. Your kids play in it and everyone's happy. It's a peaceful and prosperous neighborhood. Then imagine the local authorities inform you that a bunch of gypsy 'problem families' need someplace to live and part of your garden will be confiscated for their use. Your objections fall on deaf ears. The gypsies move in and fence off part of your garden for themselves. They turn out to be really awful neighbors, too, screaming obscenities at your kids and throwing rocks at them. They act like they own the place! Then after a few months, you notice the fence has moved. The remaining part of your garden is now considerably smaller than it was. A few years later and the same thing happens again, only this time, the gypsies' share of your garden has suddenly increased 3-fold! And the local authorities won't do anything about it. You'd be as mad as hell if this happened to YOU, wouldn't you? Such anger is entirely understandable!

Incredibly, this is exactly what has happened to Palestine. All the decades of hatred and killing can be attributed to the unjustifiable imposition of an illegal psudo-state on the people of Palestine. And the world sits back and does nothing. The Palestinians have to deal with the matter on their own and any opposition they show to their occupiers and overlords is ruthlessly put down. The killings go on every single day. The Jews are literally getting away with murder and anyone who criticizes them is labeled antisemitic or a 'hater' – ironic, given that the Jews themselves are the biggest 'haters' in the world and always have been.

So what's the solution I hear you ask?

1.Disestablish Israel.

2.Acknowledge that the experiment has been a disastrous mistake.

3.Tear down the apartheid wall.

4.Return the land to its rightful owners and force the Jews to pay reparations to the Palestinians.

There, I think the original objective has been met. Please circulate the above to anyone who foolishly believes that the Middle East problem is incapable of solution. Thanks!